Upon a Tuesday Morning

Or, College Does Strange Things to a Person's Brain:

This is what I was thinking this morning, after my 3-hour-long class.

1.  What would happen if a car hit my umbrella?  Not me, of course, just the umbrella. . . you know how you angle umbrellas off to the side sometimes when the wind's blowing. . .

2.  Why does my dark blue umbrella have about three random magenta strings hanging off the supports on its underside?

And last but definitely not least, 3.  What would happen if I was in a crosswalk and an emergency vehicle came down the road?

Which may take some explanation: I can hear emergency sirens, but usually can't tell if they're coming closer or not until they're almost on top of me.  Combine that with an acute tendency to "freeze" when something strange happens, and you could have an interesting headline in tomorrow's newspaper:

POLICE CAR RESPONDING TO FIRE KNOCKS DOWN PEDESTRIAN ON COLLEGE CAMPUS

None Hurt.

I believe I had better go study mathematics and try to resuscitate my mental capacities. :)