In Which the Second Homeschooler Prepares for College

Me little brother is getting ready for college.

Good. grief. This, I cannot believe.

Neither can I believe that I am halfway through my junior year and, as such, will be doing intensives next semester and student teaching a year from this winter!

Anyway, B2 is getting ready. He's home-schooled all the way through, too, K-12--again, taking it a year at a time and exploring other options from time to time. As the second one through, he gets to be barraged with advice from three people! I'm sure he is very grateful! [or something...]

People ask whether academics or social life is the hardest part of a homeschooler adjusting to college. Neither, I think. The hardest thing for all of us that I've known (who have had, admittedly, a decently rigorous high-school curriculum) was losing our freedom to do what we wanted, when we wanted!

My brother's best friend put it this way: "I'm losing my childhood!"

B2 feels that way too. Fortunately my schedule has been somewhat restrictive for a while, so we kind of got used to it. Doesn't make it a great deal easier, though. Vacations are limited, mission trips are limited, everything is limited. When we aren't in school, we're working, so even summers aren't a blank slate. He has to start looking for jobs and filling out applications soon.

It's not fun, but he will get used to it. I think he will enjoy college more than I do, actually--I'm not much of a "people person," while he is.

In the meantime, I wade through field experience (basically a practicum for ed. majors) and classwork and my three jobs, and try not to be too flippant about his adjustment phase. ;)

I think I should start following some more homeschool/classroom blogs. Good for getting ideas, you know. :) And this blog needs an update too!

On another note, I'm SO excited about this school year--and not because of the classes, though they include some of my favorites (Inclusive/Special Ed., ESL, and Language Arts Methods)--but because I am so close to getting done! I can see the light at the end of the tunnel! :)

Writers' Notebook

This, is fantastic. :)

Good to laugh, sometimes, at nothing at all
photo that isn't really silly
comment meant to just be dry
To giggle
And then to laugh
A lot
is good.

Dialogue from the Book With No Name

"You've got to figure out a way to handle this," she said.

"I'll try. . . "

"No--you will."

"I will." I closed my eyes and pictured his face, got it sharp in my mind. I had to do it, for him if not for me.  "I will," I repeated. I hoped my fervency would convince my own mind. I was glad they didn't know what I'd been thinking earlier.

Today's Storm from the Pasture, and a Brief Character Sketch

Forgot yesterday, so here is something for both:

------

Lighting dashed white fire in the distance.  I counted. One-thousand-one, one-thousand-two, one-thousand-three, one-thousand-four...Thunder rolled. It wasn't close yet. Minutes later, turning back to the clouds, I watched a white curtain descend over the thunderheads. Rain. Lots of it.

-------

Kahlira:

16-year-old girl. Living in real life during the day, and dream world at night. (Bit of fantasy here--just a way to play with two plots at once). Special talents: animals. Not necessarily what you call an animal communicator, but able to connect with them on an intuitive level. Easy enough in the dream world, but transferring it to real life? Not so fast.

From the Book With No Name...

Two paragraphs today. From the Book With No Name, or, the Autobiography That Isn't. ;)

            The end of summer came faster than I thought. Soon we finished loading up the big yellow moving truck and were ready to drive away. Mommy and Ben climbed into the car and I climbed into the truck beside Daddy. I buckled my seatbelt and tried not to bounce up and down. Daddy started the engine and we all drove out. The neighbors waved. I waved back. I’d already promised to write them letters when we got to Wyoming.

            We drove and drove and drove. We drove through mountains, and through desert, and over the salt flats. Sometimes there were horses in the fields beside the road. Most of the time there weren’t. Finally we got to the last big mountains we had to go over. We climbed and climbed. The truck’s engine got hot and we had to stop. I was tired. Mommy was tired. Everyone was tired, but we had to keep going. Finally the truck cooled down and we kept driving. A few hours later, we turned into the driveway between two big bushes. Next to it was the house I’d already seen on the video. We were in Sheridan at last!

Facebook, Yoga, the Bible, and Getting Up (2)

(Continued from here much remiss in posting this!)

 Upon looking at my habits I find myself getting out of bed and getting on Facebook more often than I got out of bed and got into the Word. Now I have taken many breaks from the big FB and don't consider myself addicted. In fact the political and ideological drama that goes on among some of my friends frequently tempts me to cancel my "membership" altogether! But for sure my priorities are skewed. So this begged another question. . .

Could I take something bad and use it for good?

I am getting distracted by socializing in the fake world. What about using the fake world of socialization (otherwise known as social media) to get deeper into the Word and develop true, deep relationship with God for myself and others?

And so the idea came about of, next semester, having a twice-weekly Bible study and prayer time. But once a week, to have it online. On Skype or Google+, or whatever we can find that works. So that we don't have to get together in person with our busy schedules.

Perhaps it will be early. Perhaps it will be late. But either way, it helps us to stay focused. Perhaps does a better job than yoga, even. ;)

Classes done.

Freedom!! :-) Well, still work, after today. But you know...

Maybe more time to think. Maybe more time to write. We'll see. :)

Facebook, Yoga, the Bible, and Getting Up (1)

Hi, my name is Briana, and I'm a sleep-aholic.

I'm naturally more of a morning person than a night person, but I still struggle getting up. I could make excuses and say that it's different getting up at 4:30 to 5:00--that most college kids are lucky to roll out of bed by 7--but that's beside the point. What does it matter when the alarm clock goes off, if I don't get out of bed when it does?

In interests of learning to get up, I read an article the other day about how to make yourself a morning person. This particular person said that one thing that made them into an early bird was being part of a certain yoga group that met every morning at 6 a.m. In order to get to work after the yoga meeting, this person had to learn to get up early and function at that time!

So I started thinking about what would get me up early. I came up with a bunch of things that wouldn't. . .

• Not school--if I desperately have to get school done, I will get up, but with my new techniques of hitting it hard over the weekend to wipe out a good chunk of routine activities, I don't usually desperately have to get it done. 
• Not exercise--when I'm half-asleep in bed, exercise is the last thing I want to do!
• Not my animals--though animals would get me out of bed, I don't have any at the moment that really require that. 
• Not worship. Ow. But it's true. Worship does not motivate me to get up earlier. This is a problem.

A big problem.

(To be continued. . . )

Life

One of the "altars" my little guys and I made today

First "real teaching" done! It went well. Short but well. I thought I had over-planned so that was a bit of a surprise; but okay, I would rather go short than too long. My field experience partner had her lesson on Wednesday--I helped out--and it went really well too. We got good feedback both days.

And we finished our longer-term placement at an urban school this morning. I will miss my little 4th- and 5th-grade guys, but so glad to be done with planning! :)

April our Environmental Education class is going to lead a three-day outdoor field school in Smoky Mountain National Park for home-schooling families. I'm excited! Have volunteered to help my professor work with said home-schoolers (lol), in case he wants it, and it seems he does! So I had better get my thinking cap on as to ideas of things to do. On the trip itself, a friend and I will be in charge of creating, implementing, and leading all the activities for the pre-K-to-first-graders and their associated parents. I'm sure it will a great time.

But this week is the end of our field experiences this semester except for that field school.

Next semester I have three classes with field experience. At least one of them has a scheduled time to meet, two hours a week Friday morning. Sigh...it's all good but kind of like nursing clinicals, it plays havoc with work schedules and the like. Especially when one is trying to work three jobs.

A month from next week is finals. Doesn't seem like it should be here yet! Doesn't help that it's still frigid cold half the time, so it doesn't feel like summer's coming at all!

More thoughtful post coming, maybe about Facebook, yoga, the Bible, and getting up early. (Good enough teaser there? Don't start freaking out yet...I'm not joining any Eastern religious practices!) Today I just thought I would post about life sometimes, as it happens too. :)

Bible Teacher!

Detailed lesson plans. You'll never use them in real life...but you've still got to make one every time you teach in field experience, just on general principles.

Hi, my name is Miss Briana.
This is my friend Miss T___. 

How many of you can remember a time when God protected you?

Oh dear God, help me, I'm a teacher!  A BIBLE teacher!

Not really, not yet. Just field experience. Every single class in the Elementary Education program here requires you to have so many hours of experience observing and teaching in a real-life classroom. But it's still scary every time. And to start with Bible class?!!

I have skipped a whole morning of intensive Bible-study "boot camp" weekend seminars to take a mental break and then finish this Bible lesson for the third-graders I'll be meeting tomorrow morning. It's scary I tell you.

Bible class? Okay forgive me, I was home-schooled. We never had Bible class. We had family worship, but no class. Help me, Lord, I feel like I'm heading out to give Bible studies.  I am heading out to give Bible studies. This could help make or break these kids' opinion of Christianity, of God.  Bible class is the #1 scariest class for me in the whole curriculum. Who cares that it's not on TCAP or ITBS tests and I'll never teach it if I end up in a public school. It just is so...important.

So I pray. Sometimes, it can be good to be scared! :)

Post-Homeschooler Diaries (warning: random)

. . . a very random installment that shall return from time to time, as I feel like it. :)

In this story,

Post-Homeschooler Returns to School

Spring. Break. In her pre-post-homeschooling days (a.k.a. the days when she was a real-live homeschooler), Post-Homeschooler never had one of those. Well she had spring,

and she had break,

but not both. Except when she went on mission trips, which were more it-feels-like-summer and not-break. 

But great experiences nonetheless.

Now, however, Post-Homeschooler has break. Spring break. The proverbial nectar of the gods, it grants life to the fainting college student. 

 

Or at least a return to the homeschooling lifestyle, which for this particular Post-Homeschooler, entails sleeping in till the unearthly hour of seven o'clock in the morning, reading deep books, and riding horses. Oh, and working. With a few things like eating and sleeping thrown in as well. You know, the whole stimulate-the-mind-and-exercise-the-body thing. Very good for you.  

 

Spring break, however, 

is short.

VERY short. 

Did I mention it is short?

Shorter than this Post-Homeschooler is tall. Yep.

So, with much grief and indignation, Post-Homeschooler returns to school.

 Dear humongous blue backpack, I would love you even more if you weren't always full of school stuff!

These are not this semester's books. This semester's are fatter.

Sigh. Why must one become a post-homeschooler? :)

Before Midterm Checklist...

Study for religion midterm #1 an hour.

Take break, check e-mail, check Facebook, check Blogger.

Persuade myself to go study for World Geography another hour.

Do a bad job of persuasion.

While procrastinating, decide to write blog post about procrastination.

Get iPod and listen to classical music to improve my brain.

Study for religion midterm #2 briefly (just writing the first 14 verses of John from memory, so fairly easy).

Wish friend would text me back about looking at her paper.

Actually get iPod and turn it on . . .

Study geography for 45 minutes or so.

Check e-mail, check Facebook, check Blogger.

Still don't get reply from friend.  Figure she will text me about an hour before suggested appointment to look at paper.

Lose all motivation for homework.

Go fishing for motivation in the depths of said inspiring blog post . . .

Can't See It

Picture by my brother. At the horse barn in TN.

Today for my Environmental Ed. class we spent a few hours (about four in all) on the ropes/challenge course here at my college.  It was a lot of fun and I even got to climb on top of a 30' telephone pole and jump off!  That took a bit of doing. . . but I did do it! Yay me. :)

Anyway part of what we did was a trust walk.  I've done that before, but being outside made it 100x harder.  Plus we couldn't touch our guide unless we absolutely had to.  And I got paired with a lady I had never met before in my life and barely knew her name.  Lol!  She was very nice but still! 

We started off and fortunately my guide was fantastic and by carefully visualizing what I was doing, I managed to do all right. We walked for a while and she told me to stop.  Then "take a big step up, onto this in front of you."  I stepped up and felt with my foot a bit--not high enough--still not high enough--finally I found the top of it and it was round, like a log or something! With a bit of help I climbed on top of it and then she told me to step across onto something else.  I stepped...into thin air.  Didn't feel a thing.  She told me to step further.  Apparently you don't step very far when you can't see where you're going!  I stretched--and stretched--and finally found something and made it across, then down.  Turns out we went over top of two great big logs laid side to side!  Well then...! 

After a while we switched places and I got to lead my guide (not over the logs, however).  "You're like the Holy Spirit!" she told me part way through (apparently I did okay!).  Made me think though.  It's easier to trust someone--at least for me--if you can at least feel them. 

But what if you can't?  What if you can't see or feel them?  What if we can't see or touch God?  Do we still trust then?  Maybe somebody would say, then that's foolish.  Well but it would be foolish for me to quit trusting my guide on the walk if I couldn't take off my blindfold.

And we are blind.  In this world we are blind, and we can't just rip off a bit of fabric and fix it.  Better to trust, I think.  Not saying it's easy.  But better. 

Not Good Enough

Black swallowtail butterfly on tiger lily, North Carolina

I've written several posts so far, and they sit in the drafts folder.

There are words inside, but they won't come out. 

I'm not good enough for this. 

Not good enough to write, not good enough to put myself out there as having even a slight idea of what should be.  Not good enough to teach.  Not good enough to be entrusted with introducing kids to Jesus, for sure.  Maybe not even good enough to reach out to my beloved "half-Christian" friends--though I really can't help that--even my not-good-enough-ness is better than nothing in that case, right?

 I want to be better than this.

But I struggle with self-motivation, yet I don't do well with the pressure of being part of a group.  I can't improve myself, yet I'm too independent (proud, maybe?) to ask for help from someone else.  I want to be better, I want to improve, but I'm scared of failure and I pull back and decide not to go there after all. 

So the lines stay unwritten, the words stay unspoken, the blessings that could be given and received drift away like dandelion fluff. 

This needs to change.  And I think I know how it changes, in fact.

Because He is good enough.  He is GOOD, period. It doesn't matter how not-good-enough I am, if I will just take His hand and take His power and take His ability to...BE.

Something to Think About

It's been a while.

But here is something a friend shared on Facebook the other day and I thought it was meaningful.  Enjoy, and pray about it...as I am.  :)