Teacher Diaries: Homeschooler Returns

Just a short update! It's a bright sunny morning outside and it's only 10:35 and already 50 degrees. Feels like spring.

On Thursday night, it snowed--big fluffy flakes half the size of my palm--and the roads froze and we had a snow day all day Friday. So by the time Martin Luther King Jr. Day is done, I'll have had a four-day weekend.

I love Tennessee. I love the South. Especially in January and February. :)

This coming week, probably Wednesday, I'll start teaching. Last week I observed a lot, did mini-teaching with small groups, and enjoyed my snow day Friday. This week, I will start actually teaching! Since our particular classroom only teaches reading, writing, and math (the students rotate to other teachers for science and social studies), I won't have quite so much to prepare--on the other hand, fifth-grade math is a lot of fractions. And I've never liked fractions, so I'm refreshing my memory! :)

Startled my poor mentor teacher on Thursday because she asked where I went to school. And when asked a point-blank question like that, there's only really one thing to say. . . so I told her I was home-schooled. Let's just say I don't think she was expecting that answer! ;) However, apparently she's decided I'm still not too scary, since we are planning for me to probably take the grammar lesson and at least some math lessons this coming week! We'll see how it goes!

One Step

From a day that, believe it or not, was warmer than today! 

"Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble." (Matt. 6:34)

Good morning, Thursday!

The air crackles in my nose--I can feel my breath freezing. In and out, in and out--frosty in, warmer out. I hold gloved hands to my nose, try to trap the warmer air around my face, focus on my steps, on the swing of my legs forward and back. The little rock fountain's frozen over--icicles draping over the moss, fish swimming under a glassy sheet. It begs a picture, even though my camera phone's notoriously bad at such things.

Another three stairs, behind the religion building, up the final long set of stairs to work. I take them one-and-two at a time--not brave enough to run, not warm enough to walk! Eyes laser-focus on the door; I swing it open, step inside the warmth, and gasp a still-shivery sigh of relief. I'm here. At last.

There's a trick to walking to work on cold mornings. At least, there is if you don't like the cold but you don't want to feel like a grumpy turtle when you do get to work. For me, that trick involves a double focus: #1, of course, is the warm work building. But just focusing on getting from A to B (in the cold) can create a distinct "grumpy turtle" attitude. Okay, it does create said attitude, at least for me!

#2 focus is every step. And the second focus is just as important (maybe because I forget it so easily!). Because though I may focus on the future, I live in each step.

And it's my choice how to live each of those steps. Will I live each step, or will I live each step? Will I live in frustration or in gratitude? In anxiety, or in trust? As a beggar, or as a child of the King?

It's hard (for some of us anyways) to understand living an entire life trusting God. But when you break it down to steps--to days and to hours and even to minutes--that looks a bit more doable. Not that I will do it all the time or even most of the time!--but it gives me courage to start over. To try again. To live each step in awe of that Future.

Filled with Him

Fall color many moons ago ;) 

Well, a new year is here!

For me? This last year has been, overall, good. I've grown so much, learned so much, grown SO much closer to God, met amazing (seriously, amazing!) people--it's just been a great year. I can honestly say I'm so much happier this year than I was at this time last year.

And someday I want to write a series of posts about why. :) But for now I don't have the time.

This coming year--will it be as good as last year? I think it can be. Will it feel as good? That's another question! I'm beginning student teaching in two weeks, and I'll be graduating college in May. The job search begins next week. That's a really surreal kind of feeling in itself, when I think about it (which I'm trying not to)!

But the best thing? Is that with God, every day is the start of a new year! In its own way. I don't have to wait till next January to make changes or to move forward. His mercies are new every morning! You can't ask for better than that!

This year, I decided I wanted to focus on true beauty, peace, and joy. Surrounding myself with them and asking God to fill me with them and let them spill out to others. But then I thought, oh, and love too--and hope--and--and well there are a lot of things I want to be filled with!

So really, I came to the conclusion that what I want is just to be filled. Isn't that what we all want? And so I decided (yes, maybe I'm a bit slow!) that I just want to be filled with JESUS. If that's all I am, I will be more than happy enough!

Source

Care to join me?

Teacher Diaries: Preparing for Student Teaching!

First: FINALS ARE DONE!!! My last undergraduate finals ever!!

Okay, on to the next thing: Those who know me, know that, especially when I'm nervous or stressed, I can be obsessively organized and almost never too prepared. Mind you, these aren't inborn traits--they were faithfully taught me by my mother (doesn't it always seem to go that way?) over many, many, MANY years--or at least 20-something! ;)

Anyways, I have this problem, because I deal with life by organizing everything super-obsessively. Now maybe this is good, maybe it's bad; but that's how I've survived college so it works! However, this big thing is coming down the road:

STUDENT TEACHING.

And nowhere can I find any good resource for organizing one's life during student teaching! The main theme seems to be "just survive." Which is good, but...it lacks in detail somewhat...

So I'm going to adapt some teacher organization ideas and create an organizing thing (or more than one...). And hopefully post some of it here for the benefit of any poor student teacher out there who stumbles across this part of the world. :) Also going to post some of the more odd/probably-unique-only-to-me things that I'm doing--because I'm hoping to use student teaching as a practice time to figure out how to do this next semester in real life!

Stay tuned! :)

Surrender: A Prayer

"Father, I want to know Thee, but my coward heart fears to give up its toys. I cannot part from them without inward bleeding, and I do not try to hide from Thee the terror of the parting. I come trembling, but I do come. Please root from my heart all those things which I have cherished so long and which have become a very part of my living self, so that Thou mayest enter and dwell there without a rival. Then shalt Thou make the place of Thy feet glorious. Then shall my heart have no need of sun to shine in it, for Thyself will be the light of it, and there shall be no night there. In Jesus' Name, Amen." ~ A.W. Tozer 

A friend shared this--I thought it was very powerful. May we be willing to make a total surrender to Him!

Today's Thoughts

From prayer group...

1 Corinthians 13:

"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.

4 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant 5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;6 it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. 7 Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.8 Love never ends. ..."

And 1 John 4:8:

"Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love."

So any time we see the word "love" in 1 Corinthians 13, we could replace it with "God." "God is patient and kind; He does not envy or boast; He is not arrogant or rude. God does not insist on His own way; He is not irritable or resentful; He does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.

"God bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things."

All things, for our sakes. That some of us might turn and be with Him forever.

Lord, thank You for Your incredible love. Teach me to love as You do!

Thanksgiving

• For a long technology break...
• Long hikes in the Smokies...
• Snow on the mountains...
• Safe trip home...
• Two weeks left before finals!...
• Music with family...
• A new hobby...
• Warm sun through window...
• Seeing my animals again :) ...
• Wonderful friends...
• Family...

Father, we I thank thee!

[Pre-] Teacher Diaries: Approaching the End!

This week at work the schedule for Winter semester is up.

We always fill out any time we can work and then someone puts all the options together, sort of like a giant jigsaw puzzle, so all of us office assistants get times we can work and a total number of hours that works for us.

But this time, my name's not on that paper. I'm going to be student teaching, and since I can afford not to work during student teaching (due to lots of saving and lots of scholarships--a big blessing!), I won't be working next semester.

Going to feel weird. I've worked every semester, even methods block. The past couple years, I've been working 15-16 hours a week. I wrote down that I will be back in May, just to make myself feel better. ;)

We have to apply for admission to student teaching, too. I've turned in everything and my interview is this evening. I'm still waiting impatiently for a grade on my portfolio (it should have been graded last Sunday!), but at least they haven't sent it back to me for revisions, so I'm assuming it passed in some way or other. :)

A week and a half and Thanksgiving, then two weeks and finals, and then Christmas break. And then student teaching. And resumes, job interviews, and hopefully, finally, a job.

Scared, and excited, and can't wait!

Thoughts on Teaching

...For some reason the video won't move to the bottom, where I want it. So anyways. It's a good song, listen to it. ;)

This week have been thinking about teaching. And teachers. Especially those of us who are young Christian teachers just getting out of school--but also older teachers. . .

We have a great Christian educational system here in the States. Trained teachers, (generally) supportive parents, good kids, good resources--we update our resources and textbooks and everything and it's just great. Kids can go to Pre-K through college in Christian education; it costs a LOT but you can do it. And of course then there is our favorite homeschooling, which I still entirely consider Christian education!

And just FYI please, please do NOT consider the following to be down-playing those who are SM's or career missionaries teaching without a teaching licensure or training. I admire you all like you cannot know and I pray for you all. I can't imagine doing what you're doing. God bless you!!

But, for teachers: Why are we not taking our training and what we know, and stretching it a little, and taking it outside our familiar comfort zone? Why do children in Christian schools in another country not get our long-term skills and our practice and even our resources? Think about it. If our students here had to deal with half the things students in other countries do--and I'm not even talking about physically or environmentally--we'd have parents at our throats 24/7. Just something to consider. Consider and pray about.

All of which is just to say that if you find me in Zimbabwe next year, you'll know why. . .

Really Live

Alaska's a good place to really live. ;) 

--Random thoughts inspired by my tutoring session yesterday--

I'm continually amazed (and shocked) by how infrequently kids are really living their lives richly and joyfully. I guess I shouldn't be surprised, since I guess it's rather infrequent that adults live life richly . . . but really. Why is it any sort of funny/pleasant/positive thing for you to tell me that you sleep all day on the weekend, because your mom's watching TV and you don't want to watch the shows she does? Why?

I have a professor (we will call her Dr. B; any of my Ed. major friends will know who it is ;) ) who teaches most of our reading/literacy classes. She is always emphasizing that we as teachers need to live as readers and writers if we ever expect our students to become enthusiastic and good readers and writers.

I think she's right. But not to just live as readers, or as writers--we need to live as whole people. As writers, and readers, and mathematicians, and scientists. As musicians and artists and athletes. As hikers, runners, ornithologists, mountain climbers . . . whatever you are, do it. Do it wholeheartedly and with love and passion.

"Live to the hilt every situation you know to be the will of God."

It's contagious, a life like that. Even if your friends and students and family don't understand why you choose that vocation or hobby or . . . calling of God . . . there's something irresistible about a life that's "all there."

And if it's contagious in things of hobbies, so much more so in things of God. I believe a lot of kids brought up in Christian families and Christian schools leave because they see adults who "have" to teach or live a certain way. Not those who are really living it. How can we--how can I--live wholeheartedly and completely for God?