Or, a not-so-well-thought-out post that just kind of rambles, because it has been over six months since I wrote anything, and anyone who still reads this likely believes that I'm dead or missing in action.
Everything is turned upside down right now because this lovely little school doesn't have kids.
So I have been here since August (well, all summer really), trying to figure out what a teacher does with nobody to teach. It's been interesting.
I visited my best friend a lot over the summer, also visited family, took a class for my certification. Got a very mischievous ginger kitty from said best friend's family. ^_^ Read new books, enjoyed them, got new plants (currently have an African violet, an aloe vera, a basil, and a viney thing). Tried to recruit kids with not a whole lot of success.
Continued to repeat that last sentence indefinitely this fall. Did finally register one child officially for the January semester--yay!! Also heard that two will not be able to come back till next fall--hrmm. :/
Created a school website, chased my (proverbial) tail in circles over various projects, some of which were accomplished and some of which weren't, and here we are at the end of September and I have received a tentative offer to do a long-term substitute position somewhere in Georgia (the level of secrecy regarding location is both amusing and frustrating, you'd think it was classified CIA information). For various reasons I said yes (with my board chair's approval) and so I sit here and wait a final decision that will launch me southward, at least for a short period.
But I did talk to one of my eighth graders from last year, just yesterday, and she is in academy and doing well and enjoying herself. Which, I like to think, she would not be if it hadn't been for what we'd been able to do last year. So it was worth it, however it turns out.
I know this time will be, too. Some things just take longer to see results than others.
Showing posts with label School. Show all posts
Showing posts with label School. Show all posts
Sunday, September 25, 2016
Thursday, September 17, 2015
IRL: Triumphs
There are days when I just love being a teacher.
Days when I go to church and get hugs from my kids and words of affirmation and encouragement from families.
Days when our Bible class is filled with questions and searching and going back to the Word for answers.
Days when my six kiddos are sprawled in the window seats reading their Bibles (for some of them, it's probably their first time having personal worship every day), and the sun streams in, and piano music floats in the background, and for a moment all is quiet.
Days when they get ridiculously excited about our lesson on a strong literary character.
Days when I bring a problem to them for class discussion and they solve it themselves (with a little help).
Days when I watch them get involved at church and my heart swells with joy as if I were their parent, not "just" their teacher.
Discouragement is one of my biggest setbacks--and it's something the devil throws at me almost daily. And so I hoard up these moments and days and look back on them.
Days when I go to church and get hugs from my kids and words of affirmation and encouragement from families.
Days when our Bible class is filled with questions and searching and going back to the Word for answers.
Days when my six kiddos are sprawled in the window seats reading their Bibles (for some of them, it's probably their first time having personal worship every day), and the sun streams in, and piano music floats in the background, and for a moment all is quiet.
Days when they get ridiculously excited about our lesson on a strong literary character.
Days when I bring a problem to them for class discussion and they solve it themselves (with a little help).
Days when I watch them get involved at church and my heart swells with joy as if I were their parent, not "just" their teacher.
Discouragement is one of my biggest setbacks--and it's something the devil throws at me almost daily. And so I hoard up these moments and days and look back on them.
"But I will remember the years of the right hand of the Most High." (Ps. 77:10)
Friday, September 4, 2015
Day Breaks
The sky is pink and orange over the eastern horizon.
I lean against the window seat and watch it. There's a moment of stillness in the hectic pace of life. The color shifts and fades and grows again, almost alive.
A thousand heart-stirrings surge inside. Someday I will have to leave this place. And though I love it here, I hope I leave soon.
Not for another school. Not for a marriage or for another job. Someday soon, I hope to leave because I'm not allowed to be here longer. Because only a short time after that, I'll stand and watch another sun rise. Watch a day break in which I know there'll be no end.
Soon, He will come. And the sunrise won't compare.
Oh, may the Day break soon.
But in the meantime, may it break in my heart every morning, as I watch the sun rise.
I lean against the window seat and watch it. There's a moment of stillness in the hectic pace of life. The color shifts and fades and grows again, almost alive.
A thousand heart-stirrings surge inside. Someday I will have to leave this place. And though I love it here, I hope I leave soon.
Not for another school. Not for a marriage or for another job. Someday soon, I hope to leave because I'm not allowed to be here longer. Because only a short time after that, I'll stand and watch another sun rise. Watch a day break in which I know there'll be no end.
Soon, He will come. And the sunrise won't compare.
Oh, may the Day break soon.
But in the meantime, may it break in my heart every morning, as I watch the sun rise.
Tuesday, August 11, 2015
Little Things
"Do you remember that Sabbath when we were all so tired--and we came to your house--and we made spaghetti and random tortilla things--and sat and talked--and played in the hammock?!"
"Do you remember that evening when we had that snow day and we all came over and had popcorn and hot chocolate and tea and talked?"
"Do you remember when we sat on the lawn and looked at the sunset?"
"Do you remember..."
Yes, I remember. How could I forget? Last semester I had the great privilege of becoming "mom"/"big sister"/"twin sister"/general-carer-for-of-people to a rather large group of college students. Many of whom I'm still in touch with, still their sister, still even called mommy on occasion. (All this, by the way, makes me ridiculously happy).
And I've noticed something. As we re-connect over the summer, and as I hear and recite with them the times most precious to us, we remember the big things--but it's the little things we really remember. The times when we felt heard and loved and we felt safe and cared for. The times when we looked another in the eye and said or just felt: "You too?!'
Those are the times we remember. And usually they were tiny times. Spur-of-the-moment thoughts. Words said that seemed to take no root at all. A quick invitation to a few friends. Popcorn and tea. But they are what sank in deep.
I'm increasingly convicted that we are not called to great things. We are called to a hundred tiny little things. God alone does great things. But He does them through our tiny actions.
May I do little things in His love.
"Don't look for big things; just do small things with great love. ...The smaller the thing, the greater must be our love." (Mother Teresa)
Tuesday, May 19, 2015
IRL: Summer Begins
- Quiet days at the office...
- Reading Pilgrim's Progress, Hinds' Feet on High Places, Captivating, and To Kill a Mockingbird...
- Long-distance book clubs...
- Arranging new songs...
- Google Hangouts with friends...
- Beautiful new lyrics stuck in my head all day...
- Honeysuckle and privet-scented nights...
- Catching up and talking with little brothers and friends...
- Planning a weekend trip to my "new home" to order books, have meetings with the pastor, meet (even more) people, and start getting ready for July...
- Poetry
- Music
- Delighted with others' joy :)
- Solo hikes in the rain
- Thunderstorms
"There are different kinds of happiness," she said. "There is an exuberant happiness, that comes bubbling up and bubbling out--like Old Faithful. And there's a quiet happiness, like when you're hiking with your family at 5,000 feet. And there's a bittersweet happiness, missing the old and being grateful for it, standing alone in the rain, driving by yourself across the mountains. But they're all happiness. All to be embraced."
Wednesday, April 22, 2015
Other Side of Chivalry
"UGH!"
She stomps her foot and crosses her arms and scowls. Seventh-graders haven't yet mastered the art of the death glare, but they're getting close. Especially this one.
He looks at her with a crooked smile and doesn't say anything (he's smart). With an exaggerated sigh, she flings her arms to her sides petulantly and stomps . . . through the door.
He grins and waits for me to go through and closes it behind us.
"He's trying to be a gentleman, M," I smile; "let him do it."
And they say chivalry is dead. Girls say chivalry's dead. Are we the ones who've killed it?
I find this definition when I look up "chivalry": "the combination of qualities expected of an ideal knight, especially courage, honor, courtesy, justice, and a readiness to help the weak."
I don't think girls really mind courage or justice, or even honor--look at the popular movies and books and you know we like those things. But it's that "courtesy" thing, especially because courtesy ties precisely to the last item in that list: "a readiness to help the weak," that gets us.
God made people to be strong. He made guys to be strong. He made girls to be strong too. Look at the women in the Bible and you see strength all over the place. Eve, Deborah, Esther, Jael . . . these women are no pushovers. And we, as their daughters, want to be strong. We want to be the warrior princess of the story. And our culture pushes that even harder. Women must be "empowered"; we must be tough and strong and not give in to anything. Especially men.
We say this--we do this--partly because strength is built into us, and partly because we are afraid. The strength part is good. The fear part is not. Because fear always makes a fake hardness, a brittle china sort of toughness that isn't at all tough. Instead, it breaks and cuts.
What are we afraid of? It probably depends to a degree on the individual girl, but I'd say there's one thing that carries through us all: We are afraid of being hurt.
"But I'm not hurting you!" the poor guy protests. "I'm being nice to you!"
Yeah, you are. But you are also, even in one small way, making me dependent on another person. You. I'm depending on you to hold that door for 30 seconds and not let it smash back in my face. I'm depending on you to hand those fallen books back and not toss them away just to spite me. I'm depending on you to not cut in front of me in line. Little things, yeah, but I'm depending on you. And that is a terrifying place to be. Most girls have been let down enough little or big times (even by seventh grade) that we're gun-shy of any kind of dependence.
Maybe it's a scary place for you too, gentleman at the door. Maybe it's not. I don't know. But if you want to make it better, what do you do?
Keep doing what you're doing. Try to be patient. Try to be a little bit nicely stubborn--sometimes that's what it takes. But don't just be a gentleman when it comes to holding doors or picking up books or letting me go first in the potluck line. Be dependable other places too. Build my trust. I don't care if I'm not and never will be your girlfriend. We all need to build trust--you, and me, and my seventh- and eighth-graders, and all of us.
Girls? That's a whole different post. But try to see the true strength behind accepting courtesy. It takes a lot more strength to graciously accept an offer that makes you momentarily dependent on another, than it does to bull your way through alone. Remember that. And act on it.
If we want chivalry, we can't refuse it. If we want kindness, we can't put it down. If we want to be open and true with each other, we must move past that fear that cuts.
She stomps her foot and crosses her arms and scowls. Seventh-graders haven't yet mastered the art of the death glare, but they're getting close. Especially this one.
He looks at her with a crooked smile and doesn't say anything (he's smart). With an exaggerated sigh, she flings her arms to her sides petulantly and stomps . . . through the door.
He grins and waits for me to go through and closes it behind us.
"He's trying to be a gentleman, M," I smile; "let him do it."
And they say chivalry is dead. Girls say chivalry's dead. Are we the ones who've killed it?
I find this definition when I look up "chivalry": "the combination of qualities expected of an ideal knight, especially courage, honor, courtesy, justice, and a readiness to help the weak."
I don't think girls really mind courage or justice, or even honor--look at the popular movies and books and you know we like those things. But it's that "courtesy" thing, especially because courtesy ties precisely to the last item in that list: "a readiness to help the weak," that gets us.
God made people to be strong. He made guys to be strong. He made girls to be strong too. Look at the women in the Bible and you see strength all over the place. Eve, Deborah, Esther, Jael . . . these women are no pushovers. And we, as their daughters, want to be strong. We want to be the warrior princess of the story. And our culture pushes that even harder. Women must be "empowered"; we must be tough and strong and not give in to anything. Especially men.
We say this--we do this--partly because strength is built into us, and partly because we are afraid. The strength part is good. The fear part is not. Because fear always makes a fake hardness, a brittle china sort of toughness that isn't at all tough. Instead, it breaks and cuts.
What are we afraid of? It probably depends to a degree on the individual girl, but I'd say there's one thing that carries through us all: We are afraid of being hurt.
"But I'm not hurting you!" the poor guy protests. "I'm being nice to you!"
Yeah, you are. But you are also, even in one small way, making me dependent on another person. You. I'm depending on you to hold that door for 30 seconds and not let it smash back in my face. I'm depending on you to hand those fallen books back and not toss them away just to spite me. I'm depending on you to not cut in front of me in line. Little things, yeah, but I'm depending on you. And that is a terrifying place to be. Most girls have been let down enough little or big times (even by seventh grade) that we're gun-shy of any kind of dependence.
Maybe it's a scary place for you too, gentleman at the door. Maybe it's not. I don't know. But if you want to make it better, what do you do?
Keep doing what you're doing. Try to be patient. Try to be a little bit nicely stubborn--sometimes that's what it takes. But don't just be a gentleman when it comes to holding doors or picking up books or letting me go first in the potluck line. Be dependable other places too. Build my trust. I don't care if I'm not and never will be your girlfriend. We all need to build trust--you, and me, and my seventh- and eighth-graders, and all of us.
Girls? That's a whole different post. But try to see the true strength behind accepting courtesy. It takes a lot more strength to graciously accept an offer that makes you momentarily dependent on another, than it does to bull your way through alone. Remember that. And act on it.
If we want chivalry, we can't refuse it. If we want kindness, we can't put it down. If we want to be open and true with each other, we must move past that fear that cuts.
Sunday, March 15, 2015
Teacher Diaries: New Journey
Yesterday and Friday found me up at my new community/church/school! Spent Friday looking around for apartments and possible places for my horse, and then yesterday was Sabbath School, church, and potluck.
It was really a great weekend--overwhelming sometimes and exhausting for the introvert who met what seems like a hundred new people, but great! The church members are really wonderful, very friendly and welcoming. I could hardly have a conversation without at least three other people coming up to say hello and welcome! Beautiful little active church, a healthy growing school and active homeschool community :) . I'm excited. God is doing big things there and I'm grateful He's given me the chance to be part of it!
It will be a big shift for sure as I transition. I've never lived away from home before, so it's all kind of happening at once. ;) But it's still fairly close which is a big positive. I can come down to visit home on a weekend or my family can come up. Friends can come up from university too, if they want to.
Life feels like it's duly in an uproar right now! Decisions--ah I hate decisions and there are about a thousand just waiting in the wings! But I know God's got His hand in this and He'll bring me through. That's what I'm holding on to. :)
It was really a great weekend--overwhelming sometimes and exhausting for the introvert who met what seems like a hundred new people, but great! The church members are really wonderful, very friendly and welcoming. I could hardly have a conversation without at least three other people coming up to say hello and welcome! Beautiful little active church, a healthy growing school and active homeschool community :) . I'm excited. God is doing big things there and I'm grateful He's given me the chance to be part of it!
It will be a big shift for sure as I transition. I've never lived away from home before, so it's all kind of happening at once. ;) But it's still fairly close which is a big positive. I can come down to visit home on a weekend or my family can come up. Friends can come up from university too, if they want to.
Life feels like it's duly in an uproar right now! Decisions--ah I hate decisions and there are about a thousand just waiting in the wings! But I know God's got His hand in this and He'll bring me through. That's what I'm holding on to. :)
Monday, March 9, 2015
First Placement Done!
Well my first student teaching placement is done!
The kids all made me cards Friday and I got hugged to death multiple times and had several offers to be kidnapped and hauled away to various students' closets/basements/etc. I suppose I'll take that as a compliment! ;)
I will miss them but at the same time it was an enormous relief on Friday afternoon when I got home, knowing I was done with that first placement. I love the kids but the environment I guess was still being stressful even though I'd gotten used to it. I walked around Friday afternoon feeling like I had a literal weight off my chest, haha!
Now I'm working in the office at college over spring break, and reminding myself that I can still understand Spanish. I've let it slide since freshman/sophomore year but I'll need it again come summer for my new job. This coming Friday I'll go up to my new school (the one where I actually have a job!) for the weekend. I've been talking with a number of the school board members on the phone these past couple weeks. Everyone has been super friendly and welcoming so far and I'm excited to meet them "for real" outside of just an interview trip. Excited and scared, but trying to focus on the excited part. ;)
A week from today I start my second placement. That will be a K-8 one-room school and I am super excited! I'm hoping to be able to meet with my mentor teacher sometime this week, or at least talk with her on the phone--we'll see. It will be a new adventure for sure--very different from my first placement in a lot of ways!
The kids all made me cards Friday and I got hugged to death multiple times and had several offers to be kidnapped and hauled away to various students' closets/basements/etc. I suppose I'll take that as a compliment! ;)
I will miss them but at the same time it was an enormous relief on Friday afternoon when I got home, knowing I was done with that first placement. I love the kids but the environment I guess was still being stressful even though I'd gotten used to it. I walked around Friday afternoon feeling like I had a literal weight off my chest, haha!
Now I'm working in the office at college over spring break, and reminding myself that I can still understand Spanish. I've let it slide since freshman/sophomore year but I'll need it again come summer for my new job. This coming Friday I'll go up to my new school (the one where I actually have a job!) for the weekend. I've been talking with a number of the school board members on the phone these past couple weeks. Everyone has been super friendly and welcoming so far and I'm excited to meet them "for real" outside of just an interview trip. Excited and scared, but trying to focus on the excited part. ;)
A week from today I start my second placement. That will be a K-8 one-room school and I am super excited! I'm hoping to be able to meet with my mentor teacher sometime this week, or at least talk with her on the phone--we'll see. It will be a new adventure for sure--very different from my first placement in a lot of ways!
Sunday, January 18, 2015
Teacher Diaries: Homeschooler Returns
Just a short update! It's a bright sunny morning outside and it's only 10:35 and already 50 degrees. Feels like spring.
On Thursday night, it snowed--big fluffy flakes half the size of my palm--and the roads froze and we had a snow day all day Friday. So by the time Martin Luther King Jr. Day is done, I'll have had a four-day weekend.
I love Tennessee. I love the South. Especially in January and February. :)
This coming week, probably Wednesday, I'll start teaching. Last week I observed a lot, did mini-teaching with small groups, and enjoyed my snow day Friday. This week, I will start actually teaching! Since our particular classroom only teaches reading, writing, and math (the students rotate to other teachers for science and social studies), I won't have quite so much to prepare--on the other hand, fifth-grade math is a lot of fractions. And I've never liked fractions, so I'm refreshing my memory! :)
Startled my poor mentor teacher on Thursday because she asked where I went to school. And when asked a point-blank question like that, there's only really one thing to say. . . so I told her I was home-schooled. Let's just say I don't think she was expecting that answer! ;) However, apparently she's decided I'm still not too scary, since we are planning for me to probably take the grammar lesson and at least some math lessons this coming week! We'll see how it goes!
On Thursday night, it snowed--big fluffy flakes half the size of my palm--and the roads froze and we had a snow day all day Friday. So by the time Martin Luther King Jr. Day is done, I'll have had a four-day weekend.
I love Tennessee. I love the South. Especially in January and February. :)
This coming week, probably Wednesday, I'll start teaching. Last week I observed a lot, did mini-teaching with small groups, and enjoyed my snow day Friday. This week, I will start actually teaching! Since our particular classroom only teaches reading, writing, and math (the students rotate to other teachers for science and social studies), I won't have quite so much to prepare--on the other hand, fifth-grade math is a lot of fractions. And I've never liked fractions, so I'm refreshing my memory! :)
Startled my poor mentor teacher on Thursday because she asked where I went to school. And when asked a point-blank question like that, there's only really one thing to say. . . so I told her I was home-schooled. Let's just say I don't think she was expecting that answer! ;) However, apparently she's decided I'm still not too scary, since we are planning for me to probably take the grammar lesson and at least some math lessons this coming week! We'll see how it goes!
Thursday, January 8, 2015
One Step
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| From a day that, believe it or not, was warmer than today! |
"Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble." (Matt. 6:34)
Good morning, Thursday!
The air crackles in my nose--I can feel my breath freezing. In and out, in and out--frosty in, warmer out. I hold gloved hands to my nose, try to trap the warmer air around my face, focus on my steps, on the swing of my legs forward and back. The little rock fountain's frozen over--icicles draping over the moss, fish swimming under a glassy sheet. It begs a picture, even though my camera phone's notoriously bad at such things.
Another three stairs, behind the religion building, up the final long set of stairs to work. I take them one-and-two at a time--not brave enough to run, not warm enough to walk! Eyes laser-focus on the door; I swing it open, step inside the warmth, and gasp a still-shivery sigh of relief. I'm here. At last.
There's a trick to walking to work on cold mornings. At least, there is if you don't like the cold but you don't want to feel like a grumpy turtle when you do get to work. For me, that trick involves a double focus: #1, of course, is the warm work building. But just focusing on getting from A to B (in the cold) can create a distinct "grumpy turtle" attitude. Okay, it does create said attitude, at least for me!
#2 focus is every step. And the second focus is just as important (maybe because I forget it so easily!). Because though I may focus on the future, I live in each step.
And it's my choice how to live each of those steps. Will I live each step, or will I live each step? Will I live in frustration or in gratitude? In anxiety, or in trust? As a beggar, or as a child of the King?
It's hard (for some of us anyways) to understand living an entire life trusting God. But when you break it down to steps--to days and to hours and even to minutes--that looks a bit more doable. Not that I will do it all the time or even most of the time!--but it gives me courage to start over. To try again. To live each step in awe of that Future.
Tuesday, November 11, 2014
[Pre-] Teacher Diaries: Approaching the End!
This week at work the schedule for Winter semester is up.
We always fill out any time we can work and then someone puts all the options together, sort of like a giant jigsaw puzzle, so all of us office assistants get times we can work and a total number of hours that works for us.
But this time, my name's not on that paper. I'm going to be student teaching, and since I can afford not to work during student teaching (due to lots of saving and lots of scholarships--a big blessing!), I won't be working next semester.
Going to feel weird. I've worked every semester, even methods block. The past couple years, I've been working 15-16 hours a week. I wrote down that I will be back in May, just to make myself feel better. ;)
We have to apply for admission to student teaching, too. I've turned in everything and my interview is this evening. I'm still waitingimpatiently for a grade on my portfolio (it should have been graded last Sunday!), but at least they haven't sent it back to me for revisions, so I'm assuming it passed in some way or other. :)
A week and a half and Thanksgiving, then two weeks and finals, and then Christmas break. And then student teaching. And resumes, job interviews, and hopefully, finally, a job.
Scared, and excited, and can't wait!
We always fill out any time we can work and then someone puts all the options together, sort of like a giant jigsaw puzzle, so all of us office assistants get times we can work and a total number of hours that works for us.
But this time, my name's not on that paper. I'm going to be student teaching, and since I can afford not to work during student teaching (due to lots of saving and lots of scholarships--a big blessing!), I won't be working next semester.
Going to feel weird. I've worked every semester, even methods block. The past couple years, I've been working 15-16 hours a week. I wrote down that I will be back in May, just to make myself feel better. ;)
We have to apply for admission to student teaching, too. I've turned in everything and my interview is this evening. I'm still waiting
A week and a half and Thanksgiving, then two weeks and finals, and then Christmas break. And then student teaching. And resumes, job interviews, and hopefully, finally, a job.
Scared, and excited, and can't wait!
Tuesday, October 14, 2014
Really Live
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| Alaska's a good place to really live. ;) |
I'm continually amazed (and shocked) by how infrequently kids are really living their lives richly and joyfully. I guess I shouldn't be surprised, since I guess it's rather infrequent that adults live life richly . . . but really. Why is it any sort of funny/pleasant/positive thing for you to tell me that you sleep all day on the weekend, because your mom's watching TV and you don't want to watch the shows she does? Why?
I have a professor (we will call her Dr. B; any of my Ed. major friends will know who it is ;) ) who teaches most of our reading/literacy classes. She is always emphasizing that we as teachers need to live as readers and writers if we ever expect our students to become enthusiastic and good readers and writers.
I think she's right. But not to just live as readers, or as writers--we need to live as whole people. As writers, and readers, and mathematicians, and scientists. As musicians and artists and athletes. As hikers, runners, ornithologists, mountain climbers . . . whatever you are, do it. Do it wholeheartedly and with love and passion.
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| "Live to the hilt every situation you know to be the will of God." |
And if it's contagious in things of hobbies, so much more so in things of God. I believe a lot of kids brought up in Christian families and Christian schools leave because they see adults who "have" to teach or live a certain way. Not those who are really living it. How can we--how can I--live wholeheartedly and completely for God?
Friday, October 10, 2014
[Pre-] Teacher Diaries: Last Classroom Semester
So wow, this semester has been full.
Plato, Aristotle, Locke, Rousseau, Dewey. Education. Papers. Huge tests that praise God, I did a lot better on than I expected!
Research projects, in the classroom. Fifth-grade classroom. So. much. paperwork. All my placements this semester, except P.E., are in fifth grade--ha!
Reading assessments. So. Many. reading assessments! Classroom observations, anecdotal notes, now two kids to tutor. One is probably the lowest reading level in her class; the other is probably the most disengaged. This is going to be fun!
P.E. classes, fitness activities, games, teaching kids how to hop. Do we really have to teach kids how to hop these days?! What has the world come to?!
Twelve-page World Religions papers, studying all kinds of religions. Grateful for a Christian perspective. Wondering where God's call will lead, later on. . .
Flying paper planes with little boys at work (no it's not part of my "normal" work, but hey, you do what you gotta do!). Chats with wise friends about student missions and what-after-college and all those things good seniors talk about. ;)
Now a very full weekend with GYC-SE meetings and Sunday convocation and school Apple Festival. The race never ends. . . on the other hand, I tell myself it is good preparation for working in a small school later on. :)
Plato, Aristotle, Locke, Rousseau, Dewey. Education. Papers. Huge tests that praise God, I did a lot better on than I expected!
Research projects, in the classroom. Fifth-grade classroom. So. much. paperwork. All my placements this semester, except P.E., are in fifth grade--ha!
Reading assessments. So. Many. reading assessments! Classroom observations, anecdotal notes, now two kids to tutor. One is probably the lowest reading level in her class; the other is probably the most disengaged. This is going to be fun!
P.E. classes, fitness activities, games, teaching kids how to hop. Do we really have to teach kids how to hop these days?! What has the world come to?!
Twelve-page World Religions papers, studying all kinds of religions. Grateful for a Christian perspective. Wondering where God's call will lead, later on. . .
Flying paper planes with little boys at work (no it's not part of my "normal" work, but hey, you do what you gotta do!). Chats with wise friends about student missions and what-after-college and all those things good seniors talk about. ;)
Now a very full weekend with GYC-SE meetings and Sunday convocation and school Apple Festival. The race never ends. . . on the other hand, I tell myself it is good preparation for working in a small school later on. :)
Tuesday, September 2, 2014
[Pre-]Teacher Diaries: Last Year
Well it is the last semester of regular classes.
Next semester is student teaching.
Coming up so fast!
This semester for some reason is being super hard. I think a combination of senioritis and hard classes and still trying to make friends in a new group.
But you know what, He is still there. And every day He finds some way to remind me: This is not where you are to stay. This is only a step in the road.
And even if I have no earthly clue what is going to happen after this year? That's okay. 'Cause He's got it.
So, one day at a time! I am off to read more classical education theory, write P.E. lesson plans, and get ready for Remediating Reading Difficulties!
Next semester is student teaching.
Coming up so fast!
This semester for some reason is being super hard. I think a combination of senioritis and hard classes and still trying to make friends in a new group.
But you know what, He is still there. And every day He finds some way to remind me: This is not where you are to stay. This is only a step in the road.
And even if I have no earthly clue what is going to happen after this year? That's okay. 'Cause He's got it.
So, one day at a time! I am off to read more classical education theory, write P.E. lesson plans, and get ready for Remediating Reading Difficulties!
Friday, July 18, 2014
Little Girl With the Sticker
I don't know how old she was. I don't even remember her name. And I haven't seen her since that day six (or was it seven?) years ago. Probably won't see her ever again.
I do remember her shy smile, her tangled-almost-matted hair, and the sticker on the middle of her forehead.
I remember how she tagged after me, borrowed my camera, sat beside me, squeezed behind me to throw little arms around my neck, begged to have her picture taken, asked me to sit in the shade with her and take pictures.
I said, "Later."
Because I was fifteen years old and my "best" friend, G, had a bigger following of girls at the school in Belize and I wanted to be with G and I wanted to have all the girls follow me like she did and I didn't have that much time for one little girl who just wanted to sit in the shade and take pictures.
At least I did invite her to play with us.
She did for a little bit but the other kids pushed her back and she went away and sat in the shade and watched. We played all kinds of games and she watched. I fell and wrenched my knee hard but I got up and kept playing because you know, that's who I was.
And then I said goodbye and she gave me a hug and went and sat in the shade and watched me go away. And I didn't come back because on the goodbye day I'd finally gotten to work with the guy I had a crush on and no, they didn't really need me on the job, but I sure wasn't going to leave, just to say goodbye to just one little girl who wanted to sit in the shade and take pictures.
"That little girl with the sticker?" said G later, "I think she's kinda left out. I think they pick on her a bit."
And I didn't say much but a bit of guilt pricked at my stomach and maybe my knee ached a bit more. Maybe it still aches a bit.
So whenever that knee hurts I remember the little girl in the shade--so much like the bigger little girl who she wanted to sit with--and I remember to make time to sit with the little girls and the little boys and the bigger girls and boys who are still little inside. To make time to take pictures and give hugs and jump rope and twirl them around in the air, to lock eyes with them and tell them I love you. And so does He. To make time to make a big deal about a sentence or a crayon scribble or a math problem donebadly beautifully.
And someday if I ever find that little girl again, I'll squeeze her tight and hand her my camera. And we'll just sit in the shade and take pictures. Maybe all day.
I do remember her shy smile, her tangled-almost-matted hair, and the sticker on the middle of her forehead.
I remember how she tagged after me, borrowed my camera, sat beside me, squeezed behind me to throw little arms around my neck, begged to have her picture taken, asked me to sit in the shade with her and take pictures.
I said, "Later."
Because I was fifteen years old and my "best" friend, G, had a bigger following of girls at the school in Belize and I wanted to be with G and I wanted to have all the girls follow me like she did and I didn't have that much time for one little girl who just wanted to sit in the shade and take pictures.
At least I did invite her to play with us.
She did for a little bit but the other kids pushed her back and she went away and sat in the shade and watched. We played all kinds of games and she watched. I fell and wrenched my knee hard but I got up and kept playing because you know, that's who I was.
And then I said goodbye and she gave me a hug and went and sat in the shade and watched me go away. And I didn't come back because on the goodbye day I'd finally gotten to work with the guy I had a crush on and no, they didn't really need me on the job, but I sure wasn't going to leave, just to say goodbye to just one little girl who wanted to sit in the shade and take pictures.
"That little girl with the sticker?" said G later, "I think she's kinda left out. I think they pick on her a bit."
And I didn't say much but a bit of guilt pricked at my stomach and maybe my knee ached a bit more. Maybe it still aches a bit.
So whenever that knee hurts I remember the little girl in the shade--so much like the bigger little girl who she wanted to sit with--and I remember to make time to sit with the little girls and the little boys and the bigger girls and boys who are still little inside. To make time to take pictures and give hugs and jump rope and twirl them around in the air, to lock eyes with them and tell them I love you. And so does He. To make time to make a big deal about a sentence or a crayon scribble or a math problem done
And someday if I ever find that little girl again, I'll squeeze her tight and hand her my camera. And we'll just sit in the shade and take pictures. Maybe all day.
Tuesday, April 29, 2014
Returned
Just a quick post to say I am still alive, the kiddos didn't eat me! :)
Really it was an amazing experience, totally confirmed my call to kids' ministry. God has given me the biggest passion for the salvation of HIS children, it's amazing. Love it. They're exhausting and wearing and teaching and working with them takes every bit of me and then some, but He came through and is still coming through every time. I can't wait to see where He's going to put me!
This summer is going to be fairly relaxed, at least on paper it looks like that. I'm taking my Praxis exams (teacher professional exams) in less than a month, and then I have the rest of the time to work in the office, read, write, and enjoy my last summer as a college student. Praying about opportunities for ministry throughout the summer, though. I don't want to stop just because there aren't continued opportunities through the college!
Anyway, hopefully I will have more time and more coherent thoughts to blog about over the summer. We will see. :)
Really it was an amazing experience, totally confirmed my call to kids' ministry. God has given me the biggest passion for the salvation of HIS children, it's amazing. Love it. They're exhausting and wearing and teaching and working with them takes every bit of me and then some, but He came through and is still coming through every time. I can't wait to see where He's going to put me!
This summer is going to be fairly relaxed, at least on paper it looks like that. I'm taking my Praxis exams (teacher professional exams) in less than a month, and then I have the rest of the time to work in the office, read, write, and enjoy my last summer as a college student. Praying about opportunities for ministry throughout the summer, though. I don't want to stop just because there aren't continued opportunities through the college!
Anyway, hopefully I will have more time and more coherent thoughts to blog about over the summer. We will see. :)
Sunday, April 6, 2014
Teacher Diaries: Starts Tomorrow!
Tomorrow is our first day of intensives! It's supposed to be super rainy and windy so please pray we don't blow/wash away on our way down there!
Nervous, but can't wait to meet the kids and get started--at least it's not our first time at this school, or in longer-term placements. It will be my first long-term time in a multi-grade placement since freshman year (and freshman year was 2nd-8th grade), so that will be interesting. One step closer to where I really believe God's calling me--hopefully it'll confirm that even more. :) One way or another, He continues to guide. :)
Nervous, but can't wait to meet the kids and get started--at least it's not our first time at this school, or in longer-term placements. It will be my first long-term time in a multi-grade placement since freshman year (and freshman year was 2nd-8th grade), so that will be interesting. One step closer to where I really believe God's calling me--hopefully it'll confirm that even more. :) One way or another, He continues to guide. :)
Saturday, August 31, 2013
I think I should start following some more homeschool/classroom blogs. Good for getting ideas, you know. :) And this blog needs an update too!
On another note, I'm SO excited about this school year--and not because of the classes, though they include some of my favorites (Inclusive/Special Ed., ESL, and Language Arts Methods)--but because I am so close to getting done! I can see the light at the end of the tunnel! :)
On another note, I'm SO excited about this school year--and not because of the classes, though they include some of my favorites (Inclusive/Special Ed., ESL, and Language Arts Methods)--but because I am so close to getting done! I can see the light at the end of the tunnel! :)
Friday, July 26, 2013
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